Becoming a Multicultural and Multilingual Parent

Remember the time before you had kids when you were imagining what kind of a parent you wanted to be? The situations you might face and how you would solve them? Perhaps you even saw someone else’s child and thought to yourself that you would react to it, solve it or deal with it differently. Majority of us have. And then we became parents and quickly realized that the reality of parenthood is often very different from our expectations. In addition to that, our living situation, the country we live in, and the people around us can all be very different from what we had imagined. 

The Reality Kicks In

For me, I had envisioned having monocultural children who would go to the same schools, the same parks and live in the same city as I did. They would also have all their family close and be raised the same way I was raised. I would have my mom to help me raise them because she did a great job with the four of us. 

Fast forward to 2022, I had a baby in Dubai, with a husband of a different nationality, roots, background, language. My mother was no longer alive. All my family members, including the ones that I got through marriage, live far away. It’s just me and my husband, and this little person we are now responsible for. From the very beginning of my pregnancy, we had to make so many decisions that I’ve never even imagined, let alone anticipated. And now, more decisions keep peeping from every corner, many of them unique and never dealt with by any of my friends back home.

As a result, I came to experience first hand  that there is no one-size-fits-all approach to parenthood. Every family is different, everyone’s life circumstances are different, we are all different and every child is different. Most importantly, it’s OK to do things differently, according to your family’s needs.

The Challenges Kick In

Now, as a mother in a multicultural and multilingual family, not only did I face challenges of parenthood, but I saw firsthand the challenges that come with raising children in such a unique environment. It can be a complex journey, but with the right mindset and approach, it can also be very rewarding and one of the most fulfilling experiences of your life.

One of the most significant challenges we face as parents in a multicultural and multilingual family is deciding whether to raise our children as mono or multilingual. Being a linguist by profession, throughout my education I touched on the benefits of multilingualism and felt a bit sad that I won’t have a bilingual child (speaking foreign language to my potential child in a fully monolingual environment wouldn’t really bring many benefits). However, getting pregnant with my husband, who grew up bilingual from infancy and fluently speaks three languages, threw me back into this field and I continued my research, confirming my views. 

Multilingualism as a Personal Choice

We had the option to choose one language and stick to it, but obviously decided to raise our child to be multilingual as we found that the essential benefits of multilingualism, such as cognitive and social advantages, outweigh any potential drawbacks, such as language confusion and alleged delay. Children in the first three years of life have an unconscious absorbent mind and are practically little sponges for receiving knowledge. The next three years, their mind is still beautifully absorbent, but on a conscious level. Small children are able to learn six languages simultaneously! 

Developing bilingualism/multilingualism in children is not an easy task, but it’s extremely rewarding for the child. 

Few Quick Facts on Multilingualism

Contrary to popular belief, multilingualism is not a cause of language delay.  In fact, it can actually enhance language development and stimulate areas of the brain that may not otherwise develop as extensively. It is important to debunk the myth surrounding language delay and multilingualism, as it can lead to unnecessary concerns and misunderstandings.

Language delay is most commonly caused by a lack of language and vocabulary development at home, assuming there are no underlying pathologies. This means that there is an identical chance for mono and multilingual children to have language delay as it doesn’t depend on the number of languages the child is learning. Multilingual children may have a smaller vocabulary in each language compared to monolingual children, but they are actively developing language skills in multiple languages. It is crucial to remember that it is the overall vocabulary that matters, not just the individual language proficiencies.

It is common for multilingual children to have a varied distribution of vocabulary across their languages. For example, while a monolingual child may have 20 words in their vocabulary at a certain age, a multilingual child may have 5 words in one language and 15 words in another, or even 10 words in one language, 5 in the second, and 5 in the third. Each word in each language counts as an individual word, not one collective count. In other words, if they know how to say ‘apple’ in three languages, it counts as 3 words, not one.

Unfortunately, due to a lack of awareness, some caregivers or healthcare providers may mistakenly identify language delay in the language(s) they interact with the child. This misconception can lead to unnecessary worries and potentially hinder the child’s multilingual journey.

It is crucial for parents and caregivers to understand the dynamics of multilingual language development. Multiple languages enrich a child’s cognitive abilities, enhance their cultural identity, and provide a broader perspective of the world. Embracing multilingualism allows children to open up new pathways in their brains, establish stronger critical thinking skills, and foster greater flexibility in language use.

When it comes to multilingual language acquisition, it is essential to provide an environment that supports language exposure and encourages language development across all languages spoken within the family unit. Offering consistent exposure to each language through meaningful interactions, reading, and play sessions promotes healthy language growth in all languages.

Conclusion

In this blog, I will share my journey of raising a multilingual and multicultural children, and provide insights on child development bilingualism/multilingualism, as well as methods and approaches that can be used and experiences that worked for us. My hope is that this blog will help other families in similar situations make informed decisions and navigate their own parenting journeys.